Thursday, September 22, 2011

Man-child's Hair

I have been wearing locs for close to ten years and in January, I decided to cut them.  As the temperature increased during the summer, I cut it close – practically bald.  Everyone complained or had something to say but I was happy and that’s all that mattered.

Since cutting my hair, I have notice Man-child’s strange hair care routine.   Man-child goes to the barber every two weeks for a haircut.  Whenever he gets a haircut, he stops in the beauty outlet store and buys a new hair brush and doo-rage for his head.  I never really paid this any attention until I went in his room to borrow a brush for my hair.  Man-child had at least 12 hair brushes on his night table – hard and soft brushes.  I asked “why do you needed so many”?   His response was they get old after a while.   Hmmmmm.   Next, I noticed all the different types of gels he has purchase –wave gel, moisture cream, green tea oil, jasmine oil, shea butter cream and a few others.   I asked “what’s up with all the gels?”  He said to help make his hair wavy.  Hmmmmmmm.   Next question – “why do you need all of these scarves for your head?”  His response, “they are not scarves, they are doo-rags to help me get waves".  I counted at least 15 in different colors.   Last question - “Well, why do you keep buying them? Can’t you just wash them out?”  (I think I insulted him with this one) He said very loudly, “Ma, you can’t wash them because they lose their shape and don’t fit right”.   I just backed out of his room and said no more. 

Man-child begins his morning by brushing his hair at least 30 times, he puts some cream or gel in his hands and rubs it in his hair and then he brushed it again at least 30 more times. After getting dress, he brushes his hair.   He eats breakfast and brushes his hair.  I watched him walk to the subway station and he did it again – took the brush from his pocket and brushed his hair.  Later that evening, I asked him to take Rosa for a walk.  There he was – holding the lease with Rosa in one hand and brushing his hair with the other.   After he took a shower, he stood in the mirror drying his head with the towel and the routine started all over again – gel and brushing.

I laughed out loud as I thought about his hair routine in comparison to what women do – rollers, scarves, gels, blow dryers, hair pins and who knows what else.  Since cutting my hair, I hardly think of it.  I get it cut every two- three weeks, brush it and go.  All I could think of is – What Next for Man-child  And Laugh. 

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Now That The Summer Is Over.....

I have been sitting at my desk, watching the rain fall, listening to the thunder and thinking about the past three months.  It has been rough but it has been that way for everyone.   Everyone is complaining about being over worked, loss of and lack of money, and a million of other things.  I must admit, I was doing the same thing.  I started the summer with a lot of optimism but half way through it, I became depressed thinking of all the things I needed and wanted to do but could not.  In the midst of it all, Man-child helped me to see the brighter side to it all. 

Man-child completed last school year with an overall GPA of 86.8 and I wanted to do something special with and for him this summer.  He started the summer with a part-time job that suddenly ended.  I was more upset about it than he was.  I did not want him sitting at home in front of the computer all day and I could not afford to just give him money to do the things he wanted all of the time.  Instead, Man-child was my all-around-helper.  He went to the market with his grandmother and her friends (all over 68 yrs old) and helped them with shopping and carrying bags; he baby sat for his cousins (my niece has 3 kids ages 7, 4 and 3 and they are true Rugrats); he accompanied my brother to his medical appointments so I would not have to take off from work; and he proved that he is a very good handy man around the house.  Man- child did all of this without complaining or asking to be rewarded.  I treated him to a game or two (when I could afford them) or special trips to his favorite restaurant.  He did not complain when his computer died.  I began stressed trying to find money to get him a new one but he stated that he was fine using my laptop.  In fact, since we have been sharing the one computer it works much faster than before.  Despite all of this, I was depressed because I wanted him to have fun and be able to do things like his friends and go places.  One day, Man-child said “Ma, don’t stress – I’m just glad I can help.”

I thought about what he said for a few days and I realized that my son was no longer my Man-child.  He has managed to mature and grow up while I was stressing over the cancelled vacations, the things I could not buy and the money I did not have.  He managed to be helpful and somehow have fun this summer while I just caused more gray hair to appear (well actually, I cut all of my hair again).   

 School is back in session and things are just about back to normal -he forgets his lunch money, forgets to charge his phone, he gets up half hour early to finish homework and all the other stuff I have grown accustom to during the school year. I realize now that Man-child is more of a Man than I realize.  I, Thank God for that Blessing.